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"I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred (Performed by Barnaby)

Gulping silently I realize I might as well go first and get this over with. The room goes to a soft blue and a mirror ball starts to spin, casting flashes of silver everywhere. From the side of the stage, a smoke machine puffs out smoke. I saunter out, dressed in a white three piece suit and take center stage, my back to the audience. the music starts. I turn and face them.

I'm too sexy for my love
Too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me

I'm too sexy for my shirt
Too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts

I shake my hips, spin a few more times and pull off my jacket and shirt. Swinging them over my head, I toss them to the crowd.

And I'm too sexy for Mylan
Too sexy for Mylan, New York and Japan

And I'm too sexy for your body
Too sexy for you body
The way I'm disco dancing

I'm a model, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
On the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah
And I do my little turn on the catwalk

I'm too sexy for my car
Too sexy for my car
Too sexy by far

Shaking my hips, I work the room, stopping to spin for the judges

And I'm too sexy for my hat
Too sexy for my hat
Whatcha think about that?

And I'm a model, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah,on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah
And I shake my little tush on the catwalk

I slip off my pants and remove my socks, tossing them out as well.

I'm too sexy for my cat
Too sexy for my cat
Poor pussy, poor pussy cat

And I'm too sexy for my love
Too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me

And I'm too sexy for this song.

The music ends and I bow and then exit the stage.

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